Global Warming Cash Rewards Program
I can’t wait until I finish my degrees. In part, that’s because I can’t wait to inflate my ego a bit more. However, the bigger reason is because I can’t wait to cash in on this whole Global Warming Cash Rewards™. You see, we all know that AGW is, at its heart, a political conspiracy, and those who are helping achieve goals on its agenda are being rewarded – and copiously, I might add – with cash values. Hence the Global Warming Cash Rewards Program™; on the day you get your Ph.D, I hear you are given an application. It’s sort of like a Visa Rewards card – each time you propagate or spread a talking point defending AGW in the scientific arena or blogosphere, you get points. At the end of each fiscal quarter, you can cash in your points for nifty swag such as guaranteed publication in climate science Journals, a plug by the crew at RealClimate in a high-profile blog entry, or various paraphernelia such as t-shirts, hats, and rain jackets. Of course, there is an even better option – you can “bank” the points and at the end of each year, whatever banked points you have are re-distributed as cold, hard cash in the form of a grant from the NSF or a major government entity!
I can’t wait until that day. I do believe there is a BMW 135i in Alpine White waiting for me…
Ah, to be a young atmospheric scientist eager to cash in on the climate change conspiracy!